The
Anime-zing Race 2
Episode Seven
Authors Notes
Since Im now working full-time, I have no idea what this
will do to my schedule, but I did manage to get episode eight
completed beforehand, and with a month of flak time I can
hopefully get episode nine set. Any delays probably wont
kick in until the very end. Anyway, we move on to Vandread, the
only series which was legitimately considered for the first
season, but missed the cut (as opposed to this season where I
heavily considered/planned several legs including FLCL, Comic
Party, and yes even that damn Ai Yori Aoshi). It was fun visiting
this one again for race details.
Recap
Arumi: (VO) Last time, on the Irresponsible Captain Tylor leg of
the Anime-zing Race
(Shot of Jessie and Ayla unimpressed at the Soyokaze.)
Arumi: (VO) The teams headed to the year 7000, which was overwhelming to some, and underwhelming to others.
Jessie: (VO) Cmon, its 2,000 years in the future and this is supposed to be an amazing race- is this the best you can do??
(Shot of Yukito in the Zero-G simulator, followed with a shot of him fainting.)
Arumi: (VO) The Detour doesnt sit well with Yukito, forcing Touya to pick up the slack.
Touya:
(VO) Yukis the strongest person I know, but his health
isnt always the greatest. So I could only guess how severe
this was. And thats hard to do, especially when were
in this race.
(Shot Yukari & Minamo and Noboyuki & Tenchi sneaking away on the Soyokaze.)
Arumi: And despite their brief alliance not panning out, Noboyuki & Tenchi still benefit from tagging along with Yukari & Minamo.
Yukari: Hey! Didnt we shake you two off?
Tenchi: (dry) Were gluttons for punishment.
(Shot of Koji pulling Koichi on the Pit Stop mat ahead of May & Max.)
Arumi: (VO) Recognizing that they were tied for last, Koji & Koichi jumped ahead of their alliance partners at the very last second, but May & Max got the last laugh
(Shot of Arumi at the Pit Stop while May hugs Koichi.)
Arumi: This is the first of three non-elimination legs, and you are both still very much in the race.
(Rapid shots of the seven remaining teams at various points in the race.)
Arumi: (VO) Still seven teams left, but that changes tonight on the Vandread leg of the Anime-zing Race!
****
ANIME-ZING RACE ****
12 TEAMS OF 2:
TOUYA & YUKITO (Best Friends / Students- Cardcaptor
Sakura)
KOJI & KOICHI (Twin Brothers- Digimon)
JESSIE & AYLA (Rivals- Battle Athletes)
MAY & MAX (Siblings- Pokémon)
SETA & KEITARO (Master & Apprentice- Love Hina) {ELIMINATED}
NABIKI & KASUMI (Sisters- Ranma ˝) {ELIMINATED}
LINA & GOURRY (Traveling Companions- Slayers)
YUKARI & MINAMO (Best Friends / Teachers- Azumanga Daioh)
NOBOYUKI & TENCHI (Father & Son- Tenchi Muyo)
MINATO & YUKINA (Sisters-In-Law- Nadesico) {ELIMINATED}
CHIHARU & YAMAZAKI (Classmates- Cardcaptor Sakura) {ELIMINATED}
YAMAKI & RILEY (Dating Co-Workers- Digimon) {ELIMINATED}
13 LEGS
15 SERIES
6 COUNTRIES, 6 DIMENSIONS, 3 PLANETS AND 2 SPACESHIPS
**** THE ANIME-ZING RACE ****
Leg
Seven
(A
full complement of exterior and interior shots of the Soyokaze.)
Arumi: (VO) This is the Soyokaze, the runt of the United Planets
Space Force fleet. Captained by the infamously irresponsible
Justy Ueki Tylor, this battleship is the sixth Pit Stop in the
race.
(Shot of Lina & Gourry checking in.)
Arumi: (VO) Teams checked in for a mandatory rest period which gives them the chance to eat, sleep
(Shot of Yuriko, May, and Gourry having a lovely little chat, until Max draws May away.)
Arumi: (VO) and mingle with the other teams. During the Pit Stop, Max expressed his displeasure with Kojis move at the end of the last leg.
(Now alone, May complains.)
May: What happened to get you so upset?
Max: You didnt notice that Koji just tried to get us eliminated?
May: Dont worry about it, Max, we survived.
Max: Yeah, but Koji wasnt counting on that. I bet he does it again next time if we let him.
May: If its such a big deal to you, why did you let him do it last time?
Max: Because, May, I knew it was a non-elimination leg. I wanted to see if hed try anything.
May: Wait, you knew?
Max: Yeah. You see, on that last clue it usually says the last team to arrive
(May pulls Maxs cheeks angrily.)
May: You could have told me that before! I almost had a heart attack!
Max: Well, frankly your hearts been hurting our game plan so
May: Max, we dont have a game plan.
Max: Thats true. And we need one if were going to outlast Koji.
May: Look, I dont care what he did, I am not going to play backstabber. We are not racing like that.
Max: Well, he stabbed first. He just didnt draw blood. May, Koji is not afraid of eliminating us if it keeps them in the race. And if hes smart, Koichi wouldnt be either.
May: So what are we supposed to do about it? Even if us and them are stuck going at it to stay in the game, theyre going to win. Theyre faster than us, theyre stronger than us, and theyre smarter than us.
(Tylor walks by.)
Tylor: Ive been there before! Fortunately, solar flares can be your friend.
(Max ignores Tylor.)
Max: May, we need to get away from them. If were always together, were begging for trouble. I think we should find some excuse to separate and go for the Fast Forward.
Tylor: That works too.
May / Max: (angry) Do you mind??
Tylor: Nope!
(Tylor leaves anyway. May sighs and shakes her head.)
May: I just dont feel right betraying Koichi like that.
Max: Were not betraying them. We arent doing anything to put them at a disadvantage. Were just doing what we need to do to stay in the game.
(May frowns.)
Max: You and Koichi can still see each other during the Pit Stops.
(May nods in acknowledgement, but still doesnt seem too happy.)
May: I guess.
(Another exterior shot of the Soyokaze, docking at what looks to be a decent, upscale space station.)
Arumi: The seven teams dont know where theyre going next. They have to figure out how to get to the next route marker using clues found in sealed envelopes.
(Shot of Touya and Yukito checking in.)
Arumi: (VO) Touya and Yukito were the first team to arrive at the Pit Stop
(Later, they are set to go. Yukito still doesnt look 100 percent.)
Arumi: (VO) so theyll be the first to leave once the Soyokaze arrives at its destination.
(Touya
opens the clue.)
[TOUYA & YUKITO- Best Friends / Students- 1st to
Depart]
Touya: Exit the Soyokaze and walk to the docking station at the
Delta-6 mission.
(Rapid
shots through the Soyokaze and to a small, dingy docking facility
in what looked to be an upscale space station. Buzam Colessa,
better known as BC, gives us the lowdown.)
BC: (VO) Teams must exit the Soyokaze and enter the Delta-6 space
station, a mission for various interstellar vagrants. Teams will
find their first route marker as soon as they arrive at the K-02
station.
(Touya and Yukito are walking through the Soyokaze, moving at a steady pace through the ship.)
Touya: (VO) Yuki is feeling a little better after getting a good rest onboard. But it wouldnt be a good idea to be do anything too strenuous at this point. Because of the Fast Forward, we got about a forty minute jump on the other teams, so were just going to pace ourselves through this one.
(They walk down the ramp of the ship and see the route marker at the entrance to the main part of the station. Touya jogs up to it and grabs a clue as Yukito slowly follows.)
Touya: Find the marked docking station with access to the Nirvana and go to the ships hangar bay.
(Rapid
shots down the decrepit and often depressing refugee colony,
including several groups of unhappy masses. One of the
Nirvanas fighter pilots, Barnette Orangello, has more.)
Barnette: (VO) Teams will have to make their way on foot through
the wasteland of Delta-6 until they can find the docking station
with a shuttle to the Nirvana.
(Shot of a small shuttle ship leaving the station and approaching the Nirvana, a large, sleek, mothership.)
Barnette: (VO) The shuttle will make regular trips to and from the Nirvana. Once on board, teams will find the next route marker in the hangar bay.
(Touya and Yukito continue to walk through the mission, going through a narrow hallway. At the end of the hallway, Touya presses a button to open a door.)
Yukito: (VO) Nurse Harumi aboard the ship helped me out tremendously. She says I should be fine in a couple days, but for now she recommends taking it easy. That doesnt mean were giving up the race though. We are just going to hope that our lead is large enough to sustain us for awhile.
(Beyond the door is a section of the central core of the mission. They see a lot of huddled masses, most of which are glaring back at them. Touya glares back as well. Yukito smiles.)
Yukito: Dont mind us! Were just passing through.
(Touya takes Yukitos shoulder and leads him past the unwelcoming eyes.)
Touya: (quietly) Lets just get out of here, we dont want to start anything.
(They continue along. On the way, a small rubber ball bounces up against Yukitos leg. Yukito picks it up. Yukito smiles.)
Yukito: See Touya? Theyre just living their lives. In a way, were all the same.
Boy: (OS) My ball!
(A little boy runs up. Yukito bends down and hands him the ball. The boy violently takes it back.)
Boy: I saw you trying to steal it! Get out of here and leave us alone!
(He runs off. Touya nods.)
Touya: Youre right. It does feel like home. Annoying snots and everything.
(Minamo
reads the clue as Yukari gets impatient.)
[YUKARI & MINAMO- Best Friends / Teachers- 2nd to
Depart- 42 Minutes Behind Leaders]
Minamo: Exit the Soyokaze and walk to the docking station at the
Delta-6 mission.
Yukari: Walk? To where?
Minamo: Didnt you see the giant space station were stopped at?
(Yukari goes over to the window. She sees the mission.)
Yukari: Whoa better hope thats it.
Minamo: Only one way to find out.
(They start walking.)
Minamo: It feels good being in front. It feels even better staying in front. We placed second twice in a row. Considering how we were bunched together last leg, and how we went out of our way to stay ahead, this is right where we want to be.
(They exit the ship and reach the next route marker. Yukari runs for it and opens it.)
Yukari: Find the marked docking station with access to the Nirvana and go to the ships hangar bay.
Minamo: Any idea which station? I saw a few when we docked.
Yukari: Knowing our luck its on the opposite side of this place.
(Minamo thinks for a second, then walks towards the heart of the station.)
Minamo: Yeah, that sounds about right. Lets try that first.
(Lina
and Gourry are next in line.)
[LINA & GOURRY- Traveling Companions- 3rd to
Depart- 50 Minutes Behind Leaders]
Lina: (reading) You have absolutely zilch as far as money for this leg of the race.
Gourry: Whoever writes these things needs to work on their interpersonal skills.
Lina:
Having a leg in space makes me a little nervous. Levitations
spells dont prepare you for this! But I think this problem
is more in our heads than anything else. I mean, half of the
other teams havent been up in space either. Gourry and I
just have to not think about it, and anything involving Gourry
not thinking shouldnt be a problem for us.
(Touya and Yukito reach a different docking station the wrong docking station, as its empty. Touya frowns.)
Touya: Another dead end.
Yukito: Keep trying, I guess.
(Yukito sighs and sits down.)
Touya: Holding up alright?
Yukito: (winded) Just a second
(Touya stops and waits for his partner to regain his energy.)
(Noboyuki
and Tenchi hustling through the Soyokaze.)
[NOBOYUKI & TENCHI- Father & Son- 4th to
Depart- 1:03 Behind Leaders]
Tenchi: Are we always going to be running away from them?
Noboyuki: Its a race, Tenchi, get used to it.
Tenchi: Yeah, yeah
(They find the exit and run down to fetch the next clue.)
Noboyuki: (VO) I get the impression that Jessie and Ayla are still gunning for us. So its in our best interest to race as fast as we can, while doing our best to avoid confrontations. If we can do both.
(Jessie
and Ayla are at the bridge.)
[JESSIE & AYLA- Rivals- 5th to Depart- 1:05 Behind
Leaders]
Ayla: Exit the Soyokaze and walk to the docking station at the
Delta-6 mission.
Jessie: Ready for space Ayla?
Ayla: As much as anybody else.
(They run after the Masaki guys.)
Ayla:
Ive never been in space before, but Jessie has. Once again,
it seems she will be taking the lead for us, but as long as we
both recognize our roles on the team, we will find success.
(Yukari and Minamo are jogging through the refugee section. Everybody inside is staring at them.)
Yukari: I dont know whats worse- having a thousand angry eyes fixed on our every move or feeling like were back at work.
Minamo: I know. Lets get out of here before Mr. Kimura shows up.
Yukari: Koichi? Were way ahead of them.
(Touya and Yukito reach another station. This time, as evidenced by the route market, its the correct one. Barnette waits in a small shuttle. She reacts as any natural woman would when approached by Touya & Yukito- she points her gun at them.)
Barnette: (defensive) What do you want?
(Touya and Yukito both jump back in shock. Yukito starts breathing heavily.)
Touya: Were here to get to the, uh
(Touya checks the clue.)
Touya: Nirvana.
(Barnette puts the gun down.)
Barnette: Right right force of habit. Cmon.
(Yukitos still reeling from the gun, so Touya helps Yukito get on board. He does, and the ship takes off.)
(Noboyuki
and Tenchi are now walking slowly through the mission. They are
less concerned with the hostile residents than they are with
their clue.)
[NOBOYUKI & TENCHI- Currently in 4th Place]
Tenchi: Is there anything that tells us which station it is?
Theres bound to be more than two.
Noboyuki: No idea, but we have to keep moving.
Tenchi: Dad, this isnt the kind of place to be getting lost in. Lets get to the right station and get out of here.
(Jessie and Ayla run up behind them, moving much faster. Tenchi stops and stands aside.)
Tenchi: (quietly) Just let them go.
(After taking a second look, Noboyuki stops and says nothing as Jessie and Ayla run by silently. Follow Jessie and Ayla.)
Ayla: Do you know where youre going?
Jessie: I think so.
Jessie:
It may not look like it, but we really are getting our payback.
Were doing it by scaring them to death. If theyre
afraid of us theyre prone to errors, and well be
right there to capitalize off them.
(Mr.
Kimura, his brother, his woman, and his womans brother have
now shown up.)
[KOJI & KOICHI- Twin Brothers- 6th to Depart- 1:23
Behind Leaders]
Koji: Exit the Soyokaze and walk to the docking station at the
Delta-6 mission.
(Koji and Koichi step off the mat. May and Max step on the mat. They all wait for a few seconds. Max checks his watch.)
Koichi: This is awkward.
(Koji rolls his eyes.)
Max: Time!
(May
opens the clue.)
[MAY & MAX- Siblings- Last to Depart- 1:24 Behind Leaders]
May: Exit the Soyokaze and walk to the docking station at the
Delta-6 mission.
(They all hustle off together.)
May: Now that wasnt so bad, was it Koji?
Koji: Felt like a long thirty seconds, especially since were in last.
Koichi: Then lets catch up to the other teams so were not in last anymore.
(They continue down the halls of the Soyokaze.)
Koichi:
I dont know what Koji was thinking when he jumped ahead of
May and Max, and he refuses to tell me. He just says its
common sense and that we couldnt take chances. I know we
were in last, but it was still a cheap stunt. I didnt like
it.
(Continuing down the halls, the inevitable issue comes up.)
Max: You know, it was kinda my fault too. Maybe if I had told you that it was a non-elimination leg, maybe you wouldnt have reacted like that.
Koichi: Even so, I wasnt sure if it was or not, but I wouldnt have done it. I dont want to have to compete with you.
May: We dont want to compete with you either, Koichi, so were just going to forget about it for now. Its all behind us.
Koji: Maybe, but none of the other teams are. We need to get moving.
Max: Right! Even if were not competing with each other, we are competing with everybody else.
(They rush down and Max and Koichi grab the clue at the docking station.)
Max: I dont know whats worse, the fact that Kojis trying to get us eliminated or the fact that he doesnt think were on to him. We told him its water under the bridge, and he drank that without flinching. The only one giving Koji a hard time is Koichi, which is perfect for us.
(Lina and Gourry rush out into a docking station the wrong docking station.)
Lina: This should be it
Gourry: What makes you say that?
Lina: It looks like the one we came in at.
(They continue to look around.)
Lina: So wheres the stupid flag?
Gourry: Not sure. Maybe they forgot it.
Lina: Or maybe we went to the wrong one again. Jeez weve explored evil dungeons less complicated than this.
(Lina runs off. Gourry follows right behind.)
Gourry: Were really used to charging into situations and relying on our skills to get us out of them. I dont know if its just us, but that doesnt seem to be a really good strategy here.
(Barnette
and the shuttle pull back to the docking station. She gets out,
but is only there for a few moments before Yukari and Minamo
arrive.)
[YUKARI & MINAMO- Currently in 2nd Place]
Minamo: Are you the shuttle to the Nirvana?
Barnette: No, but I fly it. Youre just in time. Hop on.
(The teachers smile and board the ship.)
Yukari: Told you it was the one on the opposite end.
Minamo: Its the most obvious spot.
(The ship is again off and flying towards the majestic Nirvana.)
(Onboard
the Nirvana, Touya and Yukito reach the hangar bay. There are a
series of mechas, and a series of ships in line nearby. Yukito
takes a second to marvel at them as Touya retrieves the clue at
the nearby route marker.)
[TOUYA & YUKITO- Currently in 1st Place]
Touya: Detour- Vanguard or Dread.
(In
the hangar bay, stone-cold Meia Gisborn and geyser-hot Hibiki
Tokai brief us.)
Hibiki: Alright, a Detours usually a choice between two
tasks. But this time, they only have one job- blow something up!
Meia: They will have to do this with one of two mecha- the Vanguard or the Dread.
(File footage of Hibiki piloting his yellow Vanguard in space. The Vanguard is your classic giant robot.)
Hibiki: (VO) The Vanguards the pride of the Tarak fleet, so much that we borrowed a couple more for teams to fly. Its user-friendly, sturdy, flies smoothly, and packs quite a wallop when you connect.
(Not since the Valkyries of Macross have we seen such a two-for-one deal, as Meia is seen demonstrating her Dread- a sleek fighter jet.)
Meia: (VO) Dreads, meanwhile, represent Mejales flying technology. It runs circles around the Vanguard but the controls are very touchy and takes some skill in order to understand them.
(Both the Vanguard and the Dread proceed to blow up a yellow asteroid-sized target.)
Hibiki: (VO) Whichever one a team chooses, they will have to fly out, and then find and destroy one of the targets surrounding the Nirvana to receive their next clue.
(Touya peruses the clue as Yukito looks around at the mechs- both well-represented.)
Touya: Yuki, should we take the stable one?
Yukito: If you dont think itll slow us down too much.
Touya: I dont care. I dont want you to lose it while were getting used to the Dread.
Yukito: Vanguards fine, then.
(With the help of Meia, Hibiki, and some of the support staff, Touya and Yukito get situated in one of the Vanguards. Before taking off, Touya looks back to Yukito, sitting behind him.)
Touya: Are you ready?
(Yukito takes a deep breath, trying to hide his worry.)
Yukito: Its not like I can run away from this.
(They are cleared for takeoff, and the Vanguard shoots out into space.)
(Jessie
and Ayla are now sprinting through one of the corridors on
Delta-6.)
[JESSIE & AYLA- Currently in 3rd Place]
Ayla: I hope youre right about this.
Jessie: So do I.
(They reach the right docking station. Barnette smiles at both of them.)
Barnette: Welcome aboard. Hop on.
(They get on before Barnette does.)
Ayla: It would be nice if you left immediately.
Jessie: Yeah, weve got a couple guys on our tail and we want to make sure we stay ahead of them.
Barnette: Shadowed by a couple guys? Youve got my sympathy, sis. Lets rock.
(Barnette hops in and makes an extra-special effort to take off quickly.)
(Noboyuki
and Tenchi are in the same corridor. Tenchi points.)
[NOBOYUKI & TENCHI- Currently in 4th Place]
Tenchi: There it is!
Noboyuki: Alright!
(They get there no ship.)
Noboyuki: Isnt there supposed to be a shuttle here?
Tenchi: Maybe it already has Jessie and Ayla.
Noboyuki: So theyre going to get way ahead of us.
Tenchi: If we would have tried to keep up with them, we could have shared the shuttle.
Noboyuki: I dont think that would be such a good idea.
Tenchi: Maybe not, but trying to avoid them really cost us some time.
(Theyre stuck sitting and waiting for the time being.)
----
(The shuttle is pulling up to the Nirvana. Jessie and Ayla take a look outside. Jessie smiles.)
Jessie: Yeah now this is more like it.
Barnette: What year are you from?
Jessie: 5000?
Barnette: Wow, all the way back then? This trip must be something.
Jessie: It is now.
Ayla: You should see the groups from 2000.
Barnette: 2000? Wow, prehistoric.
Jessie: I know.
(Rather than landing in the hangar bay, Barnette lands at a drop-off point. Jessie and Ayla disembark quickly.)
Ayla: Thank you.
Barnette: Yep!
(Barnette closes the door and speeds back to Delta-6.)
Jessie: I think the hangars this way.
Ayla: What are you basing that on?
Jessie: Its a hunch.
Ayla: Better than nothing.
(They jog off.)
(Yukari
and Minamo reach the hangar bay. Minamo fetches the clue.)
[YUKARI & MINAMO- Best Friends / Teachers- 2nd at
Detour]
Minamo: Detour- Vanguard or Dread.
Yukari: Please say this is the mecha flying one.
(Minamo reads through the clue.)
Minamo: This is indeed the mecha flying one. Do we want the giant robot or the fighter jet?
Yukari: GIANT ROBO! I CHOOSE YOU!
Minamo: The jets faster.
Yukari: Okay, never mind, lets do that one. Ill drive!
Minamo: Not if I can help it.
(Meia helps them into a Dread unit and gives them a few tips before they take off.)
Yukari: (VO) I have to admit one of the big reasons I wanted to do this thing was for the chance to fly a mecha. Theyre just so cool.
(At the docking station on Delta-6, Noboyuki and Tenchi are still waiting for Barnette to return. Lina and Gourry show up first.)
Gourry: Whats going on here?
Tenchi: Were waiting for the shuttle to pull in.
Noboyuki: Pretty sure this is the place
Lina: You got here before we did? Shoot, you started behind us, didnt you?
Noboyuki: It gets worse- Jessie and Ayla beat us here.
Lina: So were in fifth now?! God I hate space.
Gourry: We can take this thing together, right?
Tenchi: Yeah, I guess so. Youre welcome to it.
Gourry: See, Lina, were not in fifth- were just tied for fourth.
Lina: Shut up, Gourry.
(Barnette arrives and both Noboyuki & Tenchi and Lina & Gourry board.)
Tenchi: (VO) Ive had enough adventures to space to feel confident enough up here. But I really feel sorry for Lina and Gourry. This must be really foreign to them.
(Touya is moving steadily along in the Vanguard, frequently looking back to check on Yukito, who is calmly riding along in the backseat.)
Touya: Holding up okay?
Yukito: Im fine. This is a good pace. Hey, theres the target.
(Touya finds it, figures out how to get a missile lock on the target, and fires. The Vanguard stops in place as two missiles shoot out and obliterate the target. Touya turns on the intercom.)
Touya: Target destroyed. Vanguard 03 returning to base.
Yukito: Um, Touya? This is Vanguard 01.
Touya: My mistake.
(They
steadily fly back, with Touya careful not to go too fast. They
arrive back at the base and Touya takes the clue from Hibiki.)
[TOUYA & YUKITO- Best Friends / Students- Currently in 1st
Place]
Touya: Run to the bridge and retrieve the clue from helmsman Bart
Garsuss work station.
(Rapid
shots to the bridge, must more extravagant than the
Soyokazes, and with plenty of room for all the crew.
However, despite all this talk about Bart, all of the crew shown
are female. Magno Vivan, or quite simply the Captain, explains.)
Captain: (VO) Teams must travel on foot to the bridge of the
Nirvana. In order to get their next clue they will have to find
our helmsmans workstation. Barts at his post, and is
ready to hand over the next clue.
(Jessie
and Ayla approach Meia and a second Dread.)
[JESSIE & AYLA- Rivals- 3rd at Detour]
Meia: Doing the Dread?
Jessie: Of course.
Meia: Great. Hop in.
(They do so. Meia gives them the same pointers she gave Yukari and Minamo. Jessie take it all in.)
Meia: Did you get all that?
Jessie: Of course.
Meia: Okay, you can take off on my signal.
(Meia stands clear and the shield descends over the cockpit. Ayla looks around.)
Ayla: Do you know what youre doing?
Jessie: I think so. I hope so.
Meia: (VO) Dread 2? Youre clear for takeoff.
Jessie: Here we go.
(She propels the ship forward and it cruises away. Jessie seems to have no trouble handling the controls.)
Ayla: Where did you learn how to fly this?
Jessie: Im just going off the tips Meia gave us. The rest is just intuition.
(Ayla shakes her head, smiles, and enjoys the ride.)
(The intuition, however, is not coming to Minamo. She is having some problems steering it in the direction you want.)
Minamo: Jeez, one nudge and it turns ninety degrees.
Yukari: Its not that hot out. Just nudge it when you need to turn.
Minamo: Okay, steady nerves no movements.
Yukari: Or you could let me
Minamo: (louder) Steady nerves!
(She controls it much better now. She takes a sigh of relief, and only moves her hands when its necessary to make a turn.)
Yukari: See, its just like driving.
Minamo: No its not. With this, you have to force yourself not to make little adjustments.
Yukari: Little adjustments? I just let the wheel do the talking.
Minamo: When was the last time you had your tires aligned?
Yukari: Uh tires aligned? What does that do?
Minamo: Answers a few of my questions about your driving.
Yukari: Whatever- theres the target. Smash it good!
Minamo: Roger.
(Minamo manages to calm down sufficiently enough to use the firepower necessary to shoot the target. They get cleared to go back.)
(Finally,
Koji & Koichi and May & Max arrive at the docking
station. The hatch is opening and Barnette is just starting to
arrive. May sits down.)
[KOJI & KOICHI / MAY & MAX- Currently Tied in Last Place]
May: Man, that was a long walk.
Max: All those poor people stuck living here
Koji: Suck it up, weve got to fly once we get onboard.
Koichi: Kojis right. Whatever were doing on the Nirvana, we have to do it fast.
(Barnette opens the hatch, and both teams board. Koichi puts his hand on Mays back as they go in. The hatch closes and Barnette takes off.)
Koji: I cant say theyve been slowing us down too much, but it seems like it. Id feel a lot better if it was just Koichi and I, but May and Max contribute just enough to be useful. Until I can find a credible reason to ditch them, theyll have to stay.
(Hangar
bay. Lina & Gourry and Noboyuki & Tenchi are in a mad
dash for the route marker. Tenchi and Gourry get there at the
same time, immediately followed by their partners.)
[NOBOYUKI & TENCHI / LINA & GOURRY- Currently Tied in 4th
Place]
Tenchi: Detour.
Gourry: Vanguard or Dread.
(Lina takes the clue.)
Lina: Let me see that.
(Both teams separate and discuss it.)
Lina: Dreads faster. Lets do that one.
(While Lina and Gourry hunt down Meia, Noboyuki and Tenchi take a longer time to decide.)
Tenchi: The Dreads faster, but the Vanguards easier to pilot.
Noboyuki: Ive never piloted mecha before, so its your call.
Tenchi: Im hardly an expert, Dad.
(Tenchi watches Lina and Gourry board their Dread.)
Noboyuki: Well, hurry up and make a decision!
Tenchi: Yeah, I dont know about those Dreads. But Im sure I wouldnt have any trouble with the Vanguards.
Noboyuki: And besides, the Vanguards represent the men!
Tenchi: (sweatdropping) Well stick with my reason.
(They head over to Hibiki and get squared away as Lina and Gourry take off.)
(Kaboom! A target blows up cleanly and Jessie flies through the debut. Shes all smiles.)
Jessie: Now that was just fun.
Ayla: Unfortunately we have to return to the Nirvana now.
Jessie: I know, I know. Lets see how fast we can get this thing.
(Ayla smiles as Jessie pulls a U-Turn, accelerates, and returns to base.)
Ayla: Jessie is only really happy when she is moving fast, so she really enjoyed being able to pilot the Dread. She is so accustomed to speed that she goes faster standing still than some people do in a full sprint.
(Yukari
and Minamo successfully land their Dread and get their clue from
Meia.)
[YUKARI & MINAMO- Currently in 2nd Place]
Yukari: Run to the bridge and retrieve the clue from helmsman
Bart Garsuss work station.
Minamo: (mocking) Ooh, according to the Pit Stop from last leg, its in the front of the ship!
(Yukari shakes her head and smiles.)
Yukari: Its not funny when you do it.
(They both laugh and run off.)
(Of
course, the bridge is at the front of the ship and Touya and
Yukito have arrived there. They see the expansive control
stations, but they are all manned by women.)
[TOUYA & YUKITO- Currently in 1st Place]
Touya: Okay
wheres Bart?
(The officers up front giggle, while the Captain and BC exchange knowing smiles. Touya approaches one of the officers who is dressed as a cow, thus disguising her quite well.)
Touya: Are you Bart?
Celtic: Moo
Touya: Well, are you?
Celtic: No! Do I look like Bart to you??
(He and Yukito walk by her.)
Touya: Sorry jeez, dont have a cow.
Yukito: Hey Touya! Look up here!
(Yukito follows Touya up to a strange-looking pool.)
Touya: I cant see anything in there.
Yukito: I know. Its worth a look.
(Touya kneels down and sticks a hand in.)
Bart: (OS) Hey!
(Touya quickly pulls back and looks at Yukito, who smiles. Touya plunges his whole head inside the pool. Inside, he sees a bald male, completely nude, trying to man the ship.)
Bart: Who are you?
Touya: Are you Bart?
Bart: Oh, do you need a clue?
(Bart hands Touya a clue.)
Bart: Now could you leave? This is my personal space, alright?
(Touya removes his head, which is not wet at all.)
Yukito: That was a little strange.
(Touya shakes it off and opens the clue.)
Touya: Find the marked Paksys station below deck, near the engine room.
(Rapid
shots down to a catwalk that faces a huge array of glowing
crystals. The only one who has any clue what this is Parfet
Ballblair.)
Parfet: (VO) Teams must go below deck and find this catwalk near
the Paksys- the Nirvanas finicky power source.
(The final two teams arrive at the hangar bay. Koichi and Max get the clues.)
Koichi: Detour. Vanguard or Dread.
Max: Looks like we get to fly mecha now.
(Max deliberately holds out the enclosed Fast Forward envelope to make sure May sees it.)
May: What was that? Flying mecha?
Koichi: Yeah, we have to choose between
May: Are you kidding me?! We cant fly mecha!
(May starts to back away, growing hysterical.)
May: This has to be some joke. I mean, were just kids. Motorcycles maybe, but not giant robots out in space. What happens if we screw up
(May continues to breathe heavily as Koichi tries to comfort her, to little avail.)
----
(In the hangar bay, May continues to panic. Meia is also nearby.)
Koji: May, the card says we have to do this.
May: But out there in space??
Meia: (supportive) Itll be fine. If you get into a fix, we can come out to help.
(Meanwhile, Jessie and Aylas Dread is landing. Hibiki looks over to the group.)
Hibiki: Meia, youve got a caller.
Meia: (to Hibiki, angry) Handle it!
Hibiki: Right
(While Hibiki gives Jessie and Ayla their next clue, Meia continues to help May.)
Koichi: Its going to be okay. Well all do this together.
Max: Yeah May, Im sure we can
(May shoots Max a really nasty glare. He silences himself immediately, smiles, and nods in understanding.)
May: No, no, I just dont like this idea. It seems too dangerous.
Max: Well, if you feel that strongly about it, maybe we should just take the Fast Forward?
May: The Fast Forward? Are you sure?
(Max smiles, finally catching on.)
Max: We might as well. We have to use it sometime.
May: Is that okay with you, Koichi?
Koichi: Yeah. Its probably for the best. Well see you at the Pit Stop.
May: Koji?
Koji: Fine, fine, but we need to make a decision now.
Max: (rushed) Great. Good luck guys, well see you later.
(May and Koichi kiss quickly before they separate. Koichi joins Koji.)
Koji: Lets do the Dreads. We cant afford to be slow and steady now.
Koichi: Right.
(Meia helps them get set up.)
Koichi: I was surprised that May reacted that strongly against the Detour. I mean, yes were flying in space, but its no more dangerous than anything else weve done. She didnt have any issue with flying in a paper airplane. It doesnt bother me though. One of us using the Fast Forward isnt the worst thing in the world at this point.
(May is still a little upset as she and Max leave the hangar. Jessie and Ayla run by them. May smiles at them.)
May: So how was it?
Jessie: Fun.
Ayla: Yeah.
May: See ya!
(Jessie and Ayla run by. Max smiles.)
Max: Wow May, I didnt think you had that in you. And here I spent all that energy on Delta-6 trying to think of a way to get them out of our hair.
(May sighs.)
May: Its a gift. But this better be worth it; were missing the chance to fly mecha because of you.
Max: I know, isnt that a shame?
(Max opens the Fast Forward envelope.)
May:
(VO) Im sorry Koichi, but I had to do it. It was the only
way we were going to get through this leg.
(The
Dread Register looks more like a friendly help desk, with several
lovely ladies at their posts ready to take your call. Gascogne
Rheinau isnt exactly lovely, but dont say that to her
face.)
Gascogne: Theres only one Fast Forward on each leg, and
its the ultimate wild card. It lets one lucky team go
straight to the Pit Stop. But each team can only use it once in
the race, so theyll need to pick the best time to lay this
card down.
(Out in space, a large support ship is refueling a Dread unit.)
Gascogne: To get the Fast Forward on this leg, a team will have to assist me and the girls at the register as we stock ammo for pilot Juras Dread. It isnt an easy job, but the most important thing- smile smile!
(One of the Dreads is flying chaotically, barely avoiding asteroids and space debree. Inside, Lina is getting frustrated while Gourry is getting motion sickness.)
Lina: Come on! Ive tamed dragons faster than this!!
Gourry: Thats because you have a spell that destroys them!
Lina: Yeah, maybe thats what this thing needs!
(Lina points a hand at the Dread control panel.)
Lina: Darkness beyond twilight, crimson beyond
(Gourry grabs Linas arm and pulls it back, causing the ship to jerk around even more.)
Gourry: No magic, Lina!!
Lina: I was just going to threaten it!!
Gourry:
Driving cars is foreign enough, but when you throw us into a
machine that flies around in space, we are way out of our league.
The fact that we picked the complicated one didnt help
either.
(In the less-complicated one, Tenchi is flying along at a solid pace. Inside, he is calmly moving forward.)
Noboyuki: Looking good, Tenchi! I cant imagine anybody going faster in a Dread without losing control.
Tenchi: I think thats the target.
Noboyuki: Yep. What do we have for weapons?
Tenchi: What dont we have for weapons?
(Since
it was developed on an all-male planet, the Vanguard has every
artillery known to man. And unlike Touya, Tenchi isnt
afraid of unloading on the poor target. They return to base and
receive their next clue from Hibiki.)
[NOBOYUKI & TENCHI- Father & Son- Currently in 4th
Place]
Tenchi: Run to the bridge and retrieve the clue from helmsman
Bart Garsuss work station.
Noboyuki: All right! Good job, Tenchi.
(They head off.)
Tenchi: Its been a bumpy trip, but I think the Detour helped bring us together again. I think I performed really well, Dad was back to being supportive instead of assertive, and we pulled ahead of Lina and Gourry by beating them the old-fashioned way. It was nice.
(May
and Max arrive at smile central, where Gascogne gives them the
411.)
[FAST FORWARD- Smile Smile]
Gascogne: Welcome to the Register. Youll have two jobs.
First, you have to take Juras order before launching, and
then youll have to tag along with me and go through a
mid-air restocking.
May: Cool.
Max: Anything we have to know?
Gascogne: No but you do have to look the part.
(Some of the other girls drag May away. Max takes a step after her, but Gascogne puts a hand on his shoulder.)
Gascogne: You might want to let her take the first part herself.
Max: Why?
Gascogne: Youll see
(Up at the bridge, Yukari and Minamo are searching for Bart.)
Yukari: This is definitely the bridge, so where the hecks the helmsman?
(Jessie and Ayla arrive as well.)
Ayla: Is this the bridge?
Minamo: Yeah, but were still looking for Bart.
Yukari: Hey, whats down at the end?
(The four women all look at the pool. Ayla kneels down, followed by the other three.)
Minamo: One way to find out
(They all stick their heads in. Bart screams.)
Bart: (OS) GET OUT!!
(The four pull out, turn around, and stand up, all in shock.)
Jessie: I did not need to see that.
Yukari: Maybe it isnt so bad being single
Minamo: Thatll last me for awhile
Ayla: Maybe we should warn May and Lina
(Two clue envelopes fly out of the goop.)
Bart: (OS) THERE! TAKE THEM!
(A video monitor turns on. Pictured is May, smiling brightly in a cute little waitress uniform, inspired by the Anna Miller franchise. She holds an order sheet.)
May: Hi! Welcome to the Register. You can find your easy-to-read menu on your console.
(Zoom out. The busty Jura Basil Elden looks at her menu.)
Jura: Thanks. Ill just go with the usual. Basic A-set, with some ABMs on the side.
(May writes that down, then smiles again at Jura.)
May: We have a special today on sidewinders.
Jura: Hmm tempting. Maybe later. I think Im good.
May: Okay, your order will be right up!
(In the Register, May hands Gascogne the order sheet. Max tries not to laugh at May.)
Max: You forgot to ask if shed like fries with that.
May: Shut up.
Gascogne: Okay, watch this
(Juras Dread pulls up to the drive-thru loading station and the other girls do their thing and add her ordered ammo to her ship.)
Max: Cool
Gascogne: Thats nothing
(Touya
and Yukito reach the catwalk. They try not to marvel at the
Paksys too much as Yukito gets the clue.)
[TOUYA & YUKITO- Best Friends / Students- 1st at
Road Block]
Yukito: Road Block. I assume you want it, Touya?
Touya: Thats fine.
Yukito: Okay, here we go.
(The
bespectacled Parfet stands in the engine room near a few sets of
smaller Paksys crystals.)
Parfet: A Road Block is a task that only one person can perform.
In this one, they are going to have a make a few minor repairs to
a broken machine and restore it to full operative status. The
only catch is that these machines are powered by the Paksys,
which often senses positive or negative emotions and
responds accordingly. In order for the machine to work right, the
repair person has to make sure the Paksys stays in a good mood.
(Touya sits down to work with the machine. He turns one cog and it shoots sparks at him.)
Yukito: Relax Touya. Take your time!
(Touya takes a deep breath and gets ready for it.)
Touya:
I think things could have been a lot harder. Yukito may not be
able to compete, but hes been very brave, and bore through
any pain hes been feeling. Not only that, but he was very
supportive and made my job of picking up the slack a lot easier.
(Koji smoothly coasts through and destroys his target.)
Koichi: Nice move.
Koji: Steady nerves is all it takes.
(They fly back to base. Nearby, another target is destroyed when Lina flies through it. Inside, she laughs.)
Lina: Now thats the way to do it!!
Gourry: I thought we were supposed to shoot at it or something.
Lina: You can live by the book, Im gonna win my own way.
(Another video screen. This time Max is sitting at a computer wearing a headset.)
Max: Refill station. How can we help you?
(Jura is flying around space as she orders.)
Jura: Lets see, I think Ill go with those sidewinders after all. Besides that, you can just top me off and maybe some homing missiles for good measure.
Max: Okay! Well be there in twenty minutes or its on us!
(Jura giggles. End communication. Max hopes off the chair and delivers a printout to Gascogne. Gascogne walks off the premises.)
Gascogne: Come on, kids.
(They follow her to a command station, and a large, bulky, well-shielded ship. All three enter.)
Gascogne: Buckle up, time to make the delivery.
(The ship flies out into space. Midway through, she contacts Jura.)
Gascogne: Were all set up here. Ready to go?
Jura: You bet!
(Jura flies in on her red Dread and pulls up underneath Gascognes ship. Gascogne draws it in and clamps it underneath, where it proceeds to restock everything.)
May: Wow! This is a lot better than delivering a pizza!
Gascogne: Yep! All compete, Jura!
Jura: Thanks a bunch, kids!
(Jura flies off. Gascogne returns to base. Once they get off the ship and return to the Register, all the girls bow to May and Max. Gascogne hands them the Fast Forward. May excitedly opens it.)
May: Congratulations you have won the Fast Forward. Check in at the next Pit Stop- Dita Liebelys living quarters.
Max: I suppose you want to change first?
(May looks at her gawdy little get-up.)
May: Why? I kinda like this look.
Max: Hey, if it saves time, its all right by me.
(They run off, giving another wave to the Register girls.)
May: Besides helping us out in the race, the Fast Forward was a lot of fun. Gascogne was great to work with, and it was a nice break from all the action. I only hope Koichi and Koji get through everything.
(Rapid
shots through the living quarters of the ship to Ditas
room.)
Satoshi: (VO) Having won the Fast Forward, May and Max can head
directly to the Pit Stop- pilot Dita Liebelys room. The
last team to arrive here will be eliminated.
(Montage of Touya doing pretty much everything imaginable to the machine. However, through it all, he maintains a straight face, and doesnt get up set when things dont work.)
Yukito:
(VO) The Road Block looked very difficult because Touya had to
make sure he didnt lose his cool. Thats not always
easy for him. I know its difficult for me to be competitive
in my state, but I think my support really helped him.
(Touya carefully replaces a panel and begins to screw it in.)
Yukito: Careful! Be gentle with it.
(Touya wraps up and presses a button on the side. The machine kicks into action and spits out a clue envelope. Touya takes it.)
Touya: Check in at the next Pit Stop- Dita Liebelys living quarters.
(More rapid shots to Ditas room.)
Satoshi: (VO) As I just said, teams must travel on foot to the housing quarters and find Ditas room, the seventh Pit Stop in the race. The last team to arrive here will be eliminated.
(At
the bridge, Noboyuki and Tenchi are urgently looking for Bart.
Tenchi spies the pool and quickly runs up and sticks an arm in.
Without too many questions, a clue is thrust into his hand. He
reports back to his Dad.)
[NOBOYUKI & TENCHI- Currently in 4th Place]
Tenchi: Found it Dad!
Noboyuki: Good work, son! Where are we heading next?
Tenchi: Find the marked Paksys station below deck, near the engine room.
Noboyuki: Okay. Nobody directly ahead of us, nobody directly behind us lets try to hurry there anyway.
Tenchi: Right.
(They go off in search of lower ground.)
Noboyuki: Things are steadily improving between Tenchi and I. For a big chunk of the leg, we ended up more than ten minutes away from both the teams ahead of us and behind us. So there wasnt much pressure and we could enjoy the game while still playing with some urgency.
(They continue running, alone, through the ship.)
----
(Yukari & Minamo and Jessie & Ayla are racing quite furiously through the halls. Jessie and Ayla begin to pull ahead, leading Yukari to make a sudden turn.)
Yukari: Nyamo! Over here!
(Minamo stops suddenly and turns.)
Minamo: What?
Yukari: An elevator!
(Yukari continues running, and almost runs over the railing and into the abyss below. However, it is technically an elevator she has found, although its just a platform and a pulley.)
Minamo: Nice! Where do we push the buttons?
Yukari: Um
(Yukari sees a string and pulls it. The platform moves up. She takes the other one and pulls. The platform moves down.)
Yukari: No problem.
(Minamo goes to help as they rapidly descend. They reach a level where they get a very close look at the large Paksys, but theres a small problem.)
Minamo: Uh Yukari
(Minamo points up and far away, at the route marker on the distant catwalk.)
Minamo: How are we supposed to get up there?
Yukari: Uh
(Yukari tries to pull the other pulley up, but loses control of it and the platform begins falling. Minamo catches the first rope, barely keeping control.)
Minamo: You pull. Ill guide this one up.
(They do so and are able to ascend.)
Minamo:
(VO) We tried to use what looked like an elevator. Not a really
smart idea.
(As she slackens the down pulley, she keeps an eye on the catwalk. The platform pulls even with it.)
Minamo: Stop.
(Yukari does so. They look at each other, still clinging their ropes.)
Yukari: Hold on
(Yukari climbs a little higher than the floor.)
Minamo: Whats that for?
Yukari: Ready one two three!
(Minamo gets the hint. She and Yukari simultaneously release their ropes and dive for the floor. They make it easily, although both fall to the ground. They slide around and watch the platform fall all the way to the bottom, crashing with a hideous clang. They shudder.)
Yukari: Maybe well take the stairs next time.
(In the crew quarters, May and Max have to ask around, but finally find an open door. They step through and find Satoshi and ditzy pilot Dita Liebely standing near the mat in Ditas room. The nearby route marker features the normal display, with VANDREAD in large green letters and THE NIRVANA in small white letters. May and Max step on, with Satoshi taking a good long look at May in the Register girl outfit. He smiles.)
Satoshi: You look pretty good in that.
May: I know. Fits me pretty well too.
Max: Makes you wonder if she would have kept the princess outfits Noboyuki and Tenchi had to wear.
Satoshi: In any event
(Satoshi clears his throat and suddenly goes from perverse to serious.)
Satoshi: May and Max? Youre team number one.
(May and Max excitedly hug.)
Max: First place. I know it was because of the Fast Forward, but its still hard to believe. Were really getting through this, and outlasting some really tough competition.
(Meanwhile,
Jessie and Ayla rush down the stairs and easily access the
catwalk. Jessie takes the clue.)
[JESSIE & AYLA- Rivals- Currently in 3rd Place]
Jessie: Road Block.
Ayla: Fire away, Jessie.
Jessie: Head to the engine room and repair a machine powered by the Paksys, a power source that responds to human emotion.
(Jessie runs rapidly to the room, where Parfet explains the details.)
Parfet: Once the machine works, and the Paksys is happy enough to power it, it will release your clue. Pick a machine and go to work!
Jessie: This will be a cinch.
(Jessie dives into a machine, quickly unscrewing the outer panel. Almost everything inside is either disconnected or connected to the wrong spot. After examining everything, she quickly begins to fiddle around inside. Above her, a small Paksys crystal starts to glow.)
Parfet: Ooh, it likes your enthusiasm.
Ayla: So do I, keep it up.
(Touya and Yukito walk around the crew quarters. They find Ditas room and walk up to the Pit Stop mat.)
Dita: Welcome, aliens, to my room!!
Satoshi: (sweatdropping) Is that your greeting?
Dita: Theyre aliens, and its my room, so yeah!
Satoshi: You didnt say that to May and Max.
Dita: They only had one alien!
Touya: Excuse me
Satoshi: Oh, right! Touya and Yukito, youre team number two.
(Yukari
and Minamo finally figure out how to get to the catwalk. Yukari
gets the clue.)
[YUKARI & MINAMO- Best Friends / Teachers- Currently in 4th
Place]
Yukari: Road Block. This person must deal with stubborn
equipment.
Minamo: Ill do it. You get angry when you run out of chalk.
(Minamo reads the clue.)
Minamo: Repair a machine powered by the Paksys. This doesnt sound too bad.
(They run in. Jessie is still working on her machine. Parfet gives Minamo further details and Minamo goes to work.)
Yukari: You know what youre doing right?
Minamo: I havent even picked up the screwdriver yet.
Yukari: Youve never picked up a screwdriver? Man, are we screwed.
Minamo: Yukari, just shut up and let me do this.
(Minamo quickly unscrews and removes the panel. She accidentally sets it down on top of the screws. One rolls under the machine.)
Minamo: Shoot!
(Minamo extends a hand under the machine.)
Yukari: What are doing?! Forget it and get going!
Minamo: I cant! If I lose this screw I cant put the panel back on!
(Minamo retrieves it and sets the screws aside.)
Yukari: Nyamo! Your crystals getting dark.
Minamo: What?
(She looks up at her Paksys. The crystal is starting to dim.)
Minamo: I just started! How can it be fading away?! Crap
(Minamo goes into the machine and examines everything.)
Minamo: Okay, one thing at a time
(Koji
and Koichi are jogging down the corridor.)
[KOJI & KOICHI- Twin Brothers- Currently in 6th
Place]
Koichi: The bridge has to be up here somewhere.
Koji: Its not like we can stop now. We have to move if we want to stay ahead of Lina and Gourry.
(Koichi turns around. Lina and Gourry are rapidly approaching.)
Koichi: Here they come!
(The twins increase their speed, but Lina and Gourry are just faster. Once their by, Koji and Koichi continue to run after them.)
Koji: At least with May and Max around, weve got somebody to be behind with us.
(Koichi doesnt respond. Hes too busy fighting for survival.)
Koji: This leg made me realize just how valuable May and Max were. Last leg was one thing, but it really would have been to our advantage to stick together until we hit a situation where only they or us will move on. Because it would be us nine out of ten times.
(Lina and Gourry get to the bridge and start asking around for Bart.)
Lina: So where is this guy? This is the bridge, right?
(The Captain and BC arent saying anything, so Lina and Gourry head down to the other officers as Koji and Koichi arrive. They look around.)
Koichi: Lina, did you find Bart?
Lina: (sarcastic) Yeah, we just decided to stick around and chat.
(Gourry heads up to one of the girls.)
Gourry: Are you Bart?
Beverly: Do I look like a Bart?
Gourry: I dont know. Is Bart a boys name or a girls name?
Amarone: Its a stupid name.
Bart: (OS) No it isnt!
(Lina, Koji, and Koichi all look to the source of the voice. Koji sprints towards it and jumps into the pool. Inside, his clothes have mysteriously vanished, and Bart does not like the company.)
Bart: This is getting worse every time!
(Bart hands Koji a clue and shoves him out. Koji flies out of the pool; his clothes back on again. Koichi runs up to him.)
Koichi: Koji, what happened?!
Koji: (delirious) Fusion evolution
Koichi: Well, youve got the clue, so lets go.
(Koichi helps Koji to his feet and they run off. Lina quickly follows by plunging in. Both Lina and Bart scream as the other bridge officers look at each other nervously.)
Amarone: Now thats just not right.
(Celtic is shuddering.)
Celtic: You guys had it easy I had the vidlink up.
(Beverly pushes a button at her station.)
Beverly: Sick bay? Celtic needs shock treatment.
(Jessie calmly screws her panel back on. She pushes the button, the Paxsys glows, and she gets her clue.)
Jessie: Perfect.
(She takes it and reads.)
Jessie: Check in at the next Pit Stop- Dita Liebelys living quarters. The last team to arrive will be eliminated.
(She and Ayla wordlessly grab their bags and take off. Yukari watches them, then turns to Minamo.)
Yukari: Cmon Nyamo, the amazons just got done.
Minamo: Im doing the best I can!
(As Minamo continues to struggle, Noboyuki and Tenchi run in.)
Noboyuki: Its all yours, Tenchi. Ill just sit back and let you fly.
Tenchi: Thanks. Which one should I take?
(Parfet leads Tenchi to his machine.)
Minamo: Is that Tenchi?
Yukari: Yeah, youve got to get moving!
Minamo: Jeez
(Shes sweating quite heavily as she tries to figure out a few key connections.)
Jessie:
Im not too bad at repairing stuff, but staying calm is
really tough in this situation. The inside of that machine was
more of a puzzle than anything else, but there were some tough
spots. I dont remember the details; it was just another
blur of adrenaline to me.
(Minamo finally replaces the panel and begins screwing it back in. In the meantime, Tenchi is ripping through his contraption, making Yukari very nervous. Meanwhile, nurse Paiway Underberg stops in to bug Parfet.)
Parfet: What are you doing here?
Pai: On my way to the bridge to help a shock case.
Parfet: The bridge is nowhere near here.
(Pai holds up her annoying frog puppet at Parfet.)
Pai: I guess were not very good at directions-kero.
Minamo: Done!
(Minamo presses the button. However, it doesnt do anything.)
Minamo: What the?! I got it! It should work!
Parfet: Paxsys doesnt want to go.
Minamo: Cmon! Please?
Yukari: Dammit, Nyamo, calm down!
Minamo: Calm down yourself! Youre the one making me so antsy!
(Pai starts writing something down in a notebook.)
Pai: Internal hostility Pai check!
(Tenchi finishes up quickly. He pushes the button and sighs. Paxsys glows and he gets his clue.)
Tenchi: Got it!
Noboyuki: Way to go!
(They run off and are well out of earshot before they open the clue.)
Parfet: You have to calm it down. Youre making Paxsys nervous.
Minamo: How am I supposed to calm this thing down?
Parfet: Figure it out. It has to be in a good mood.
Minamo: Any good mood?
Parfet: Yeah.
Minamo: Screw it then
(Minamo turns to the crystal, lifts her shirt, and flashes the stupid thing. Paxsys glows for a split second. Minamo jabs the button and the clue spits out. Yukari and Parfet sit there in stunned silence. Finally, Minamo runs back to Yukari.)
Minamo: Cmon before we get eliminated.
Yukari: Youve done that before, havent you?
Minamo: Cmon! If it wasnt for you, I wouldnt have had to resort to that.
(They take off, leaving Parfet and Pai. Parfet cleans her glasses as Pai rewinds her camera.)
Pai: Pai check!
(Jessie and Ayla reach Ditas room and urgently step on the mat.)
Dita: Welcome, friends of Mejale, to Ditas room!
Satoshi: Im not gonna ask Jessie and Ayla youre team number three.
(Koji and Koichi barely stay ahead of Lina and Gourry as they reach the catwalk. Koji grabs a clue and runs by to let the team behind get there.)
Koji: Road Block: this person must deal with stubborn equipment.
Koichi: Why dont you do it?
Koji: Fine.
(Koji quickly peruses the details and heads to the engine room. Lina and Gourry follow.)
Lina: Ive got this one. Try not to say anything stupid.
(Parfet explains the rules to both of them and they get going. Lina heads to her machine.)
Lina: Okay, lets see what we got here
(Lina picks up a screwdriver.)
Lina: What are we supposed to do with this?
Parfet: Open the panel on the machine.
Lina: Ah!
(Lina wedges the screwdriver in and pulls. In time, she forcibly pries the panel off.)
Parfet: (sweatdropping) Not what I had in mind.
Lina: What the hell is all this stuff?!
(Lina sticks her head in and looks around. She shakes her head.)
Lina: Damn, this is going to take forever.
(As she moans about it, Koji quietly analyzes the machine and calmly goes to work. As he does so, he hears a clanging sound. He pops his head out long enough to see Lina, trying to force a pipe in where it obviously doesnt go.)
Lina: Jeez, who made this so complicated?!
(Koji says nothing. He just pops his head back in as Lina continues to swear at her machine.)
Lina: (VO) With everything I do, I do it with a certain style. Its my own method of getting the job done, and its extremely effective. But that stupid Paxsys machine just didnt like me for some reason!! It obviously had some sort of prejudice against me and I didnt want to have anything to do with it.
(Noboyuki and Tenchi pull up at Ditas room and jump on the mat.)
Dita: Welcome, aliens, to my room.
Noboyuki: Hear that, Tenchi? Were the aliens now!
Satoshi: Noboyuki? Tenchi? Youre team number four.
Noboyuki: Thats the stuff!
(Noboyuki high-fives his son.)
Tenchi: That seemed like a lot of work to not go anywhere.
Noboyuki: Hey, we didnt move down either!
Tenchi: Thats true.
(They step out of the way. A couple minutes later, a somewhat upset Minamo and Yukari jump on the mat.)
Satoshi: Yukari and Minamo? Youre team number five.
Minamo: Jeez we suck.
Yukari: I wasnt the one doing the Road Block.
(Minamo sighs and walks away.)
(Back to the Road Block. Lina is going like gangbusters through the machine, throwing around parts like crazy. Koji is quietly going about his business.)
Lina: Okay, here we go, this obviously goes here, and we string that along to here, blow open a hole here and stick this one in
(Lina pops her head out and sees a burnt chard of metal on the ground.)
Lina: Here it is.
(Lina picks it up and wedges it in somewhere. She takes a long look at the device.)
Lina: Perfect.
(Lina takes the badly-mutated panel and puts it on. It doesnt stay on.)
Lina: Um
(She tries again. Again it falls off. Meanwhile, Koji wordlessly screws his own panel back on. Lina takes the screwdriver and pounds the panel into place.)
Lina: Hey, this thing works great!
(Koji stands up, and pushes the button on the machine. The Paksys roars into action and delivers the clue.)
Koichi: Good work, Koji! Where are we off to?
Koji: Check in at the next Pit Stop- Dita Liebelys living quarters.
Koichi: Well ask around.
(They take off, leaving Lina and Gourry behind.)
Gourry: Um Lina?
Lina: I know, I know. This should work
(Lina is agitated, and also a little nervous as she pushes the button. Its no wonder that it doesnt respond.)
Lina: Crap! I knew I forgot something!
(Lina forces the panel off yet again and looks around in there.)
Lina: No I didnt. It should work okay.
(She pounds the panel back on and pushes the button, again to no avail.)
Lina: Well, what the?
Parfet: I dont think it liked you beating it around so much.
Lina: The hell was I supposed to do?
Parfet: Be gentle. Nurturing. Love the machine.
Lina: I dont love machines, honey. Make this thing spit it out.
(Parfet looks at it.)
Parfet: Given what you did to it, I dont know if it works at all.
Lina: Well come on! Were already in last place! If you dont hurry up, theres no way in hell were going to keep up with those two!!
(Lina looks over to Kojis machine. They are long gone.)
Lina: Gourry? Where are the twins?
Gourry: Just left.
Lina: Why didnt you tell me?!
(As Lina argues with Gourry about that, Parfet does a quick overview of the machine. Or at least she would if she could get the panel open. Lina reaches for the screwdriver and hands it to Parfet.)
Lina: Here.
(She goes back to arguing with Gourry as Parfet pries open the panel and looks inside.)
Parfet: Ah you got all the wiring right, but some of these ends are so frayed that they dont work right anymore.
Lina: So what are we supposed to do?!
Parfet: Hmm
(Parfet has to make some calls to talk it over. Finally, she just hands over the clue.)
Gourry: (VO) They seemed to have everything really organized up here. They just didnt account for Lina doing things her way. She gets the job done she just doesnt care how.
(In the meantime, Koji and Koichi have no trouble reaching Ditas room.)
Koichi: You really saved us there, Koji.
Koji: Stay calm and its no trouble.
(They step on the mat.)
Satoshi: Koji? Koichi?
(He pauses and stares at each of them to add to the drama.)
Koji: Dont bother. We know where we are.
Satoshi: Fine, fine youre team number six.
(They nod.)
Koichi: Lets go see what May and Max were up to.
(After trudging across the ship, Lina and Gourry reach the Pit Stop.)
Dita: Friend and alien alike- welcome to my room!
Satoshi: Lina and Gourry?
(He pauses again and stares at each of them to add to the drama.)
Lina: (aggravated) Dont bother, we know where we are.
Satoshi: Youre the last team to arrive. Sorry, but youve been eliminated from the race.
(Lina shakes her head, pretty disappointed with herself.)
Lina:
(VO) You get used to doing things a certain way, and suddenly
somebody wants you to do it differently. It isnt just about
that Road Block either, trying to get through this race without
using my magic was a lot more difficult than I let on.
Gourry:
You might have to take our word for it, but we are both really
good at what we do. We just
have our own way of doing it.
Which really didnt translate that well here.
Lina:
Im not angry at getting eliminated. In fact, its
actually a bit of relief. If I was going to have to keep going
and restraining myself until my hair turns white, I would have
gone nuts. Getting to see new worlds and doing different things
was pretty cool, but in the end Im happier where I can just
be me.
End of Episode Seven
Authors
Notes
If something felt a little weird about this leg, youre
pretty perceptive. This leg had an extreme lack of
bunching, parts of the leg where teams are bunched
together before getting access to a clue (typically done through
public transportation or waiting for something to open).
Ive been doing my best to limit the bunching as much as I
can without taking the competitiveness out of the race (too much
bunching and leads dont mean anything; too little and teams
are spread too far apart for the race to be interesting). While
every leg has had partial bunching where some teams are grouped
together, the last leg was the first to even everything
completely. Because of that, and the fact that it was
non-elimination, this leg had almost no bunching and teams could
only gain or lose spots based on their actual racing skills.
The voice actor references were fairly limited, with only the
Misty, Ash, Brock reunion during the Pit Stop and
Touya and Yukitos blatant Evangelion reference (refer to
episode 4 author notes if you dont get it). Incidentally,
Ive realized this leg that between Touya and Yukitos
voice actors, both English and Japanese, references are getting
way too easy for these guys, particularly considering that Touya
and Yukito share English voice actors with other racers (Touya
and Seta are voiced by pseudonyms of Kirk Thornton, Yukito and
Koji are voiced by Steve Staley). In fact, one of the easiest
references could have come during the Touya/Bart exchange- Touya
and Bart have the rare distinction of being two characters with
the same English and Japanese seiyuu!
Unless my memory is failing me, Yukaris Giant Robo, I
choose you! line may be the first official This is
Otakudom reference this season. The line comes from an
over-dubbed scene of Giant Robo and used in a montage to show how
anime companies are changing series to make them more like
Pokémon. Also in the montage is Kuno and Kodachi impersonating
Team Rocket and Urusei Yatsuras Ataru trying to
catch Lum.
Why is Bart naked in a pool in the bridge? One of the quirks of
the Nirvana is that the only way to fly it is for Bart to
essentially bio-merge with it. Digimon rip-off? I have no idea,
but Vandreads produced by the same company that does Gate
Keepers, and theres no shortage of Digimon connections in
either of them, especially since both the dub and sub share quite
a few seiyuu.
And while theres no sense trying to explain Paiway,
its fair to say that kero is the Japanese
onomatopoeia for ribbit, and is attached to the ends of sentences
just like Dejiko (-nyo) and the Japanese Biyomon (-piyo). While
this kero news may enlighten any Hello Kitty fans, I
may have ruined Cardcaptor Sakura for a lot of you.
Next Time on the Anime-zing Race
- May & Max consider another alliance to help retain their
lead.
- A frustrated Minamo tries to put last legs Road Block
difficulties behind her.
- Koji & Koichi clash about their post-alliance racing
strategy.